Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles watch TMNT
by Tigan-Ada
Summary: The 2003 teenage mutant ninja turtles watch the 2007 movie TMNT - and it's very odd how one reacts and what one can notice in a film.
1. Chapter 1

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles watch TMNT

By Tigan-Ada

Surveillance cameras subtly click off, whirring back on a second later with temporarily repurposed programming.

Four shadows slip through the dark and locked cinema, two drifting towards the checkout counter while one swiftly vanishes into the, uh, restroom.

As Raphael groans with relief from within, Donatello locates the movie room and breaks in like a good boy. Arms getting full of snacks and treats, Leonardo and Michelangelo casually stick a few in their gobs before walking to the pre-agreed theatre room.

And then Leo stops, turning his stuffed face to the checkout counter. He muffles something or other to Mikey, who slouches his shoulders and 'mm-hmm's in response. Dutifully they return a good amount to ensure the pay checks of the employers and employees aren't damaged, before returning with a small number of assorted snacks.

The two push the door open and claim a seat each at the back row.

With a terrible moan Raphael drags his feet in after them, "…Never again… never again…"

"Dude, that's what you always say," Mikey pushes the side-arm of the seat down and stuffs a bag of lollies into the cup holder.

Leonardo shuffles in his end-row seat, trying to make room for Raphael to pass comfortably.

"It's Casey… he has these puppy-dog eyes…" he carefully rests his rear in the immediate seat next to Leonardo, "I'm _only_ not at home suffering 'cause I have'ta get away from him tonight. He doesn't know we're here, right?"

"Yes. Maybe. No."

"Mikeeyy-"

"Popcorn!" Michelangelo bends over and picks up an old piece of popcorn from the carpet. Raising it to eye-level he exclaims, "And here I thought we'd have to go without!"

"The popcorn machine is empty and shut," Leo's explanation is cut short when he side glances his little brother, "Don't you dare put that in your-"

Mikey flicks it into his mouth. He gulps, grabs his neck and gradually descends off the chair choking.

Raphael blankly watches his youngest brother writhe and hack on the floor, "…Sensei, Mikey's having a moment."

Materialising forth from the shadows, the elderly rat leans forward and plucks his son up from the recently vacuumed carpet, plopping him to his left and giving his shell an almighty whack. It's enough to propel the possibly-left-there-by-the-Foot stale popcorn out of his throat.

As they settle down Donatello somehow slips into the spare middle seat between Raphael and Splinter, the movie projectile flickering on from above, "Let the movie… begin."

Leonardo twitches, "…That's my line…"

"…Why are we watching a rented DVD at the cinemas?" Mikey whispers his delayed question.

"Because. That's why," Don elaborates.

Green fiery ooze billows onto the big screen as the title is revealed on a turning sewer lid. …That sentence makes no sense on its own.

"I like the music…" says the blue one.

"_Four turtles. Four. Brothers."_

"Narration! That's a good start on an already well-known franchise!" Mikey blinks, "…Right?"

"_Genetically reborn in the sewers of New York."_

Raphael's voice is soft, "…They know where we live now…"

"_Named after the great Renaissance masters-"_

Donatello arcs an eyebrow at the bloated glorification.

"_-and trained as ninjas."_

Mikey nudges his father, "Should we be worried about what this faceless voice-over knows?"

"…This introductory isn't humble!" Leonardo's face burns red with embarrassment, "Its acting like our very existence is awesome enough to show-off but that's just a woeful sign of pride and low self-esteem!"

"Quiet Leo. You've got pride and self-esteem issues too."

"Which makes bearing this awkwardly uncomfortable! I feel like I'm being pretentious but it's the movie being up itself…"

"_They've battled many creatures and foes, before defeating their archenemy – the Shredder."_

Michelangelo shudders, drawing his arms around himself in a self-hug, "I feel unsafe and watched…"

"_But now a greater evil is poised to destroy their very brotherhood. An evil born 3000 years ago…"_

"Oooooooooo!" the turtle's daringly ooooo.

"_It was in that time that a warrior king named Yaotl led a brotherhood, that stood side by side with one purpose… to conquer all the kingdoms of the world."_

"Too many 'that's. And unless they mean the 'known world', there's no way they could accomplish this goal geographically; and even if they could _travel the_ _world_ in 993 B.C. they'd have to compete with-"

"3000 years ago equals 993 B.C.?" Mikey sounds surprised at the number.

"Yep," Donatello twiddles his thumbs, feeling mean from his own factual criticism, "From 2007 when the movie was aired. I guess 3000 years just sounds more anciently mysterious when you don't do the historical math. And like I was saying-"

"Shut it! I can sense a fight scene!"

"_Nothing could stand in their way, as they left a trail of destruction behind them."_

Raphael laughs strangely at the battle. The _brief_ battle…

"_In his quest, the warrior learned of a constellation known as the Stars of Keekan."_

Raphael slaps a hand over Donatello's opening mouth.

"_Every 3000 years, the stars would align, opening a portal to a world of unknown power."_

"How does the narrator KNOW this?! Who IS this guy!?"

"Calm yourself Michelangelo. It is just a movie."

"_He became immortal, but at a price…"_

"I like this animation so far…" says the blue one.

"…_His brotherhood was turned to stone."_

Don shudders at the implication, "Ugh, just imagine being _paralysed_ like _that_…"

"No."

"_And upon the portal's opening, thirteen monsters were released into our world."_

"How _rude_."

"Having all those beasts in the story feels… redundant somehow," says the blue one.

Raphael's eyes are glued to the dimensional alien creatures rampaging through the armies, "I don't caaarrre…"

The scene becomes one of thick clouds of smoke blocking the view of distant mountains, sweeping down over a burning empire whilst revealing desolation and the dead of a mad war.

"_Damn_ that animation," Leo really likes the animation.

"_The warrior king was left to eternally walk the earth. Unable to die, or forget his horrible mistake."_

"Yeah, that's usually the way it goes."

"…Where'd that strong wind come from?"

Raphael shifts (uncomfortably) and smirks as the warrior king looks up at the screen, "…Yaotl can see us… he _sees you_ Mikey."

"…So, that dust twister is a fourth-wall breaker?"

"_And the monsters that were unleashed continue to plague mankind to this very day…"_

"Ruuude!"

The scene changes to a starry night over a typical Central American village.

"What is it about the colours, lighting and texture that I like so much?" Leo _really_ likes the animation.

With a wince Raphael readjusts himself, looking with boredom at the generic bad guys preying on the generically good-looking lady, "Someone's gonna get a butt-whuppin'. The law of action films is right there."

"Why do the henchmen always look the same? I'm getting real desensitised about it and it's sorta creepy."

"Maybe they're twins?" offers Leo.

"_Idiota! Watch where you're going!"_

"I feel really silly, but what are Italians doing there?" Mikey screws the edge of his mouth in confusion.

Finally relaxing as the film plays, Donatello helpfully answers his younger brother's linguistic ignorance, "Simply put, Central America has a lot of different languages. But that's Spanish. Some Europeans languages do share similar traits."

"…Oh."

The two henchmen leave the car to remove the fallen tree from the road.

Raphael grins with simple glee, "Predictable but I still look forward to these parts."

The henchman tying the car's cable around the massive trunk is suddenly jerked over with a gasp.

"_D-Dios Mio…"_

Don jerks upright from where he was drowsily lilting to Splinter's warm furry side, "BLASPHEMY!"

The second henchman cocks his rifle… and is rapidly swept into the canopy by a hooped vine, setting off rapid firing rather dangerously before he drops it.

The main boss of the criministas stands boldly in the vehicle, _"Why, you! Show yourself!"_ as the scrawny driver scrambles out of the vehicle, _"Th-the Ghost of the Jungle! He punishes those who prey upon the weak! He's coming!"_

Raph raises his eyebrows as the second henchman drops flat to the earth like a sack of deadweight.

"_I just remembered, I left the stove on, and my wife, she hates that!"_

Mikey snorts as the scrawny man makes a run for it, "That's a good one. Casey should use that once in a while."

Raphael groans, "Do not mention his name… my gut recognises it…"

"_Do you realise who you're dealing with?"_

"…OHMIGOSH LEO THAT'S YOU!" Mikey points excitedly, kicking his legs like a child.

"…Huh! Wait… why am I in the _jungle_?"

"Ripping off _Pirates of the Caribbean_ with that chase music," Raphael notes.

Leonardo chuckles and nudges him with his elbow.

"_I am not afraid of a myth. I'm not afraid of a ghost!"_

Movie-Leo makes an entrance like a bored rogue, brandishes a sword and, as the boss man charges…

"…Did you kill him?"

"Wound him?"

"Disarm him, knock him out then tie him up?"

Leo shrugs, "That's not me," as the criminista's truck is rolled down the gentle slope into the village – with no regard for the chickens pecking there – he adds, "…Y'know that bad boss guy had attitude with a really distinct design that showed it well. He could've been a more prominent and developed character if they hadn't gotten rid of him so early."

"Too bad your movie-self disagreed. He killed him. Must've had some past dealings with the guy," Raph muses.

"_The Ghost of the Jungle!"_ exclaims the typical good child of the typical good lady.

"…Leo's _dead_?!" Mikey actually pales.

"_Do you know the ghost?"_

"_He wasn't always a ghost."_

Mikey screams.

"No one is dead!" Donatello clarifies for the sake of peace and quiet during the film.

They watch the lady hack her way through the foliage with the machete.

Don's eye twitches, "…That waist… it's so unnatural. Like two spinning tops connecting to each other, like she's going to lose the precarious biological balance supporting her there and flop at the waist and break, or bend around like a possessed pipe-cleaner…"

Raph and Mikey slowly stare at him, "Thank you, Donnie, for that strange and disturbing nightmare fuel."

"_Hello?"_

Leonardo feels excited expectation building within him, but doesn't know why.

"_Is anyone here? Hello?"_

The lady plummets through an underground cave and is caught by…

"…OHMIGOSH LEO THAT'S YOU!" Mikey points excitedly, kicking his legs like a child… déjà vu.

They all lean forward in expectation of an explanation.

"_You came all the way down here to look for me?"_

"_Actually, I was already here on business."_

"Bahah, nobody cares about you," Raph elbows him playfully.

Leo snickers and pushes back, eyes still intently on the movie.

"_Some tycoon with too much time on his hands has his heart set on a collection of 3000 year old statues."_

"The statues are in _Central_ America?" Don frowns, "But the previous map marker was just _north_ of-… no, now I'm nit-picking a 3000 year gap, and concerning a wholly _connected landmass_ no less."

"_Well, you always did run with a strange crowd April."_

"That's _April_?" Donnie deadpans and leans back, "Nightmare fuel _times nine thousaaaand_!"

"_Yeah well, our strange crowd hasn't been the same without you…"_

Splinter privately chuckles at the look on Movie-Leo's face – it was so endearingly typical of his first born.

"_Things aren't looking so good back home."_

"Raph, what'd you do?" Mike playfully accuses.

Raph's stomach rumbles ominously, causing an oddly strained expression on his big brother's face before there could be any reply.

"…Never mind…"

But they all go blank-faced at Movie-Donnie's intro; then Mikey grins and Raph bursts out in mock laughter.

"I build and maintain your stuff. Remember that."

They quieten down.

"_But Donnie's a genius. Why would he take a job like __**that**__?"_

Leo took the baffled disapproval as a snub to Movie-Don's obvious stress, "Respect your brother!"

"_Well if he's doing that who's keeping an eye on Mikey?"_

"Oh no…" Raph groans in mortification, "Ooooh noooo… how can this be embarrassing _me_?"

"What?" Mikey defends himself, "That costume is so original it's ingenuous! And I'm bringing joy to the chil-!" he trails off, "…Never mind…"

"_He's a big hit."_

"_Alright, let's hear it. What's Raph doin'?"_

"Kickin' that dumb costume head thing – it stares into my soul-"

"_Well what's he do all night?"_

Movie-Raph gets singled out for a badass intro.

"SHELL YES I'M AWESOME!" he pauses mid fist-pump at the sound of his counterpart's voice, "…Am I Jewish?"

Leonardo laughs at the utter and absolute randomness of the question.

Don smiles – apparently two of his brothers are somewhat linguistically unfamiliar, "No, can't you tell?"

He blushes, "Sure I can tell…"

"Because there's a part of the brain that filters accents-"

Raph tries his very best to end the conversation now so he can watch Movie-Raph ride that motorbike, "He was speaking in the helmet and it threw me off shush!"

Some criminals bomb the side of a bank wall leading into an alley way. Totally inconspicuous.

"He took a toaster," Mikey whispers, "The greatest of crimes…"

As the scene progresses, Raphael begins to chuckle strangely again. Don and Leo knowingly side-glance the brother between them, both discreetly smiling at how giddily absorbed he is in his own badass scene complete with wide eyes, a big grin and unabashedly holding his clenched fists to his chin.

"…_The Nightwatcher."_

"_He's doing our job for us again."_

Raph is dreamily drooling.

"_Your training period ended a year ago. And Splinter says you don't write anymore."_

"You've been… in the _jungle_… for _two_ years?" Mikey reiterates just to be sure.

"_Splinter sent me down here to become a better leader."_

Leo frowns, "…How does that work Sensei?"

Splinter calmly shrugs a frail shoulder beneath his robes, "Isolation carries no weight in regards to leadership, only personal growth that may or may not reflect on the team; clearly this is just designed for the purpose of the plot. On that matter, I've never heard of such a training period…"

"_Besides, these people need me more than my brothers do."_

Mikey digs into his lolly bag, "True dat. You're like a missionary… only badass!"

"_If Master Splinter were here, he would ask you 'what is your heart telling you'…"_

"The heart can be a liar. You can't always just follow it without tuggin' back on the lead," satisfied his stomach is affably settled, Raph crosses his feet atop the head of the chair in front of him, "There, I said it."

"_Your brothers __**need**__ you Leo. They're lost without you…"_

"No offence bro, but this movie is up your shell," Raphael grunts, burly arms crossed over his chest, "Oh, the world will fall apart if Leo's not here! Oh, his presence is _so_ fundamental!"

Michelangelo snorts, "No way dude, this is sayin' somethin' bad about _Movie-us _without even meaning to! I mean, I can get the serious ache of a loved one going away like that, like when Leo had to go to the Ancient One… but think about it –a bunch of _young adults_ flailing around for one bro' to return like their only function is to suck him _dryyyy_," he pauses, "Stay away from the Movie-us, Movie-Leo! It's a trap!"

"No, no," Leo interjects, "This is about how living our own lives can end up as excuses to ignore our loved ones, how even important work can overshadow family in a way that's wrong. It's easy to become selfish in a pursuit of independence in a day and age this encouragingly self-indulgent."

Don is quietly sitting with a funny little smile, holding in his laughter at the big screen, "…I'm sorry, but that _truck_. It's too much."

They all look at the screen and found they couldn't take their eyes away from _that truck_.

"…Mikey, what have you done to the BattleShell?"

"…I made it _awesome_."

"Actually, this movie is not based on _us_ per say, but is supposed to chronologically follow the original third movie, making it the fourth one in that line."

All turtles and Splinter look blankly at Donatello.

"…Yes, that fact struck me as incredibly vague too. But the canon _is_ there, if you know your older movies, such as the Shredder being deceased-"

"EVERYONE SHUSH!" Mikey blurts out, "MOVIE-ME IS ELABORATELY SKATEBOARDING AND YOU'RE MAKING ME MISS IT!"

Indeed, Movie-Mikey is elaborately skateboarding while cheating death by dodging multiple bone-smashing and neck-snapping impacts at that speed.

"I am such an expert. It's so true."

"That's _not us_," Leo leans forward, eyeing Mikey, "Don't you _dare_ make me catch you pulling that stunt!"

"…Don't let you catch me. Got it."

"You just _encouraged_ him Leo."

"I can't help it. I _nag_. I want kids."

"_Heerreee's Mikey! …Guys?"_

Raphael chuckles mocking at the empty welcome; then furrows his brow, "You want kids?"

Leonardo meets his eyes with a piercingly blank calm, "I sent Bishop a note with my DNA."

Something about Leo's countenance switches Raphael's brain off, leaving him devoid of speech.

The continuous tranquillity of his face makes his whisper eerie, "…I think it'll work."

Just as Raphael's eyes widen a telling smile splits Leo's composure in half; Raphael sighs with relief and quietly laughs along with him.

"_Whatever. This place used to be fun."_

"This is what you guys do to me when you ignore me…" comments an oblivious Mikey. Seeming to come upon a conclusion to this film's drama he perks up, "I bet this movie is gonna be inclusive for us _all_! We – are –fa-mi-ly! I got all my brothers with me! Yea-hea-heaaah!"

END PART 1


	2. Chapter 2

They all watch the action film of Movie-Mike watching national interest rate on the news.

"…Can't believe you guys would make me do that to myself."

"That's _not us_ Mike."

"_I think it's a disgrace, taking the law into your own hands like that! Leave it to the police!"_

"Why do they always have the voices of reason sounding like a stingy old hag that no one wants to listen to?"

"…I think you just answered that yourself Donnie."

"…Well darn, that conclusion is not comforting."

"_Sure they had a bunch of guns, but they weren't like these guns!"_

A teasing grin works its way onto Leo's face, "The animation on you is so cute Mikey!"

Mike's reaction is delayed by dumbfounded-ness, "…Take. That. Back!"

"Yeesh," Raphael thumbs Leo as he turns to Mikey, "He really does want kids."

"_Get on with your life. Concentrate on your work."_

Leo points to the big screen as he speaks to Mikey, "You say that the Movie-you are all flailing around, aren't adjusting and maturing? Well, Movie-Donnie is _trying_."

"But he's so stressed and – hey, what I _meant_ was it-"

"_Beats sittin' around doin' nothin' while dirtbags run free."_

"-yeah I-! Uh, no, wait…" he deflates with a pout and mumbles, "Nothing ever comes out right for me."

"Of course he's gonna say complimentary things about his secret life," notes the purple one, "As if nothing we say could possibly be a sign there's something wrong in what he's doing behind their backs."

"_-All you do is sleep all day."_

"He could be _depressed_," Don tries to reason with his Movie-counterpart, "I know it's frustrating, but criticising the negatives is not helping! Be patient! Be compassionate!"

"_Yeah, I do nothin'. You're right. You got me all figured out!"_

Now there's something strange in watching your behaviour from afar rather than living it in the moment. Watching Movie-Raph _deliberately_ keep information from them whilst acting as if it's _their fault_ and using that to _continue feeling sorry for himself_ makes Raphael wonder if he could get into the movie universe somehow so he can knee Movie-Raph in the crutch for it.

As if pain could magically make someone see the point.

The unrealistic ideal is quashed at Movie-Raph attempting the same thing with a mock-lunge at Movie-Donnie.

"_Raphael,"_ they all watch attentively in automatic respect as Movie-Splinter takes five slow seconds to walk into the scene before finishing his sentence,_ "…Enough."_

"…He said my name," Raphael gleams like a dizzy fan girl.

"_That… doesn't prove anything,"_ but Movie-Raph saunters off full of himself anyway.

"Poor Movie-Donnie. I know how that feels… We all know how that feels," Leo feels for Movie-Donnie.

"_Donatello, this home has become like an empty shell. Each of your brothers has strengths, and weaknesses."_

"That second sentence feels tagged on, Sensei."

"_You must learn to be strong when they are weak."_

Splinter slightly frowns at where this is going…

"_If you don't learn to recognise this, then all hope is lost for our family."_

Raphael squirms in place at the sight of Movie-Splinter's deeply cutting parental grief, unable to quell the affect it has weighed on his heart. Leo, Don and Mike sympathetically hold him in their thoughts, perceptively hoping he who has caused that look in the past wouldn't take a movie scene too personally-

"WHAT! HOW _DARE_ YOU PUT SOMETHING LIKE THIS ALL ON ONE SON! WHERE IS THE PROPER DELEGATION OF FAMILY DUTY?!" Splinter's ears are folded back, his aged ruffled fur making him appear fiercely feral at his own Movie-counterpart.

Stunned, everyone blinks between the contradicting Splinters.

Mikey hands his father a few lollies and Splinter calms himself to take them graciously. They all sit in silence as the movie carries on with a timely change of beat, reintroducing Movie-April… and that barmy waist design.

"_Hey, careful! Those aren't souvenirs."_

Raph refuses an offered lolly, "Wasn't that careful though?"

Leo tilts his head at Movie-April's concern, "Am _I_ in there?"

They all quieten to hear anything to confirm this, but Movie-April merely checks the wooden crate and flips out a mobile, _"Where are you, Casey?"_

Instantly Raphael draws his legs back in, arms curling around his grumbling plastron at the name, "Hopefully somewhere far from here…"

"What happened with you and Mr Jones?" Splinter asks, concerned for his son's… persistent tummy troubles.

"Uhm… it involved a bet, our bikes… and _really old_ food…"

"Again?" he tries to cover his amusement.

"Didn't think it'd-… didn't feel that-…" Raphael gives up, "_Yeah_, again."

"_Casey can't come to the phone right now, 'cause… we're hardly workin'."_

"That makes no sense!" Don overreacts, "IT MAKES NO SEEEEEEEEEENSE!"

"Donnie chill!" Mikey leans over Splinter to pat his leg, "Let's not freak out at the minor details… let's just enjoy a movie for what it is…"

He stiffens his shoulders, but then relaxes with an exhale, "…Fine. But I don't know how long I can keep it in me."

They absorb the moment of Movie-April pouting mightily at Movie-Casey's unreliability in relative silence.

"…We should've brought them along to-"

"Noooooo!" Raph cuts Leo off.

"_No… I found him. He's not coming back…"_

"She sounds genuinely heartbroken," Don notes.

"_But… But didn't you tell him how weird things have gotten with the turtles?"_

"He knows it's a trap…" Mikey insists, whispering mostly to himself, "Suck him dryyyyyyyy…"

The movie gives a grand low sweep of a large building.

"Mmm…" feeling lightly sleepy, Donatello leans towards his father's comfortingly familiar fur, "…Is that supposed to be... an elevator? I've never trusted external elevators, the exposure creeps me out."

As Mikey views their Movie-mates walking into the uniquely monument-like building he curiously asks, "Since when did they have these types of jobs?"

"…It's just a movie Mikey," Don yawns, now fully pressed against his father's side; Splinter adjusts his position to put an arm around his tired busy boy.

"Don't fall asleep again dude, you keep doing that when we watch movies and you always miss the best parts!"

"Can't help it. Brain turns off. It gets relaxing."

"You won't miss the good stuff near the ending, right? It's no fun when you're breathing loudly."

"Don't worry, I promise."

"This is _so_ April and Casey," Leo fondly remarks as the whole building goes into lockdown.

"…Imagine if someone was standing underneath the doors at that one random point. Such a tragic squish."

"That is totally the 3000 year old immortal dude!" Mikey interrupts as the movie introduces 'Mr Winters'.

"…Is it just me, or does this 3000 year old Native American have a somewhat Western appearance?" despite himself Don latches on to something else to nit-pick, "The accent isn't surprising, as someone that old can easily master a language fluently in that time. But…"

"Are you sure those facial features are Western?" Leo tilts his head sideways at 'Mr Winter's' bold visage.

"…Well good," Mikey relaxes, "A bad dude that gets his own unique look without going overboard or looking 'perfect'. They're always the ones that are most badass 'cause they _are_, not 'cause they look the part."

Leo takes in Yaotl/Winters' demeanour, "He sounds weathered and nice. I bet he's going to be an anti-villain."

"You shouldn't give the benefit of the doubt to the baddies, Leo," Raph smirks, "Have you so soon forgotten how your first meeting with Shred-head went down?"

"Stop mentioning that. Seriously."

What was meant as a joke sizzles into a bad taste in his throat. Raphael opens his mouth to apologise but, unsure of how, ends up merely watching the film.

They all quieten for a moment…

"…Karai is in the room," Splinter says a full three seconds before she indeed does make an appearance.

They all give their father an impressed look, "…How-?"

"And there are six hidden Foot."

Sure enough, before they too appear, he's got it right.

"…Sensei. You _shouldn't_ be able to do that!" Donatello almost freaks out so close to him.

Splinter just smiles to himself; if only they knew he developed this sixth sense from watching his soap operas!

"I knew it!" Mikey exclaims as Mr Winters converses with the Foot, "He _is_ Yaotl!"

"Interesting," Don calms down and observes, "The movie has chosen to dispense with the mystery… wise call, I feel, for this story."

Raphael mockingly gapes at his brother, "Did you just say something _positive_ about a film? Shock gasp horror!"

"Funny."

"Karai looks gorgeous like that!" Mikey dares and then slyly addresses his big brother, "Hope I'm not making you uncomfortable, Leeooooo."

"…We're not even the same species-"

"You two have quite the relationship. Quite a _history_."

"I befriended and respected her. In the end we just couldn't trust each other. How do you confuse that with love-"

"Quiet!" Raph growls, "A pigeon just got eaten off-screen! How can you ignore that so heartlessly?!"

A few seconds pass before Michelangelo mouths his response back in silence. Catching the movement with his practised eyes, Leonardo leans forward in his seat and mouths back a silent retort.

They continue wordlessly mouthing and gesturing until Raph puts a hand to Leo's forehead in checking his sanity temperature, all while Donnie's unblinkingly observant gaze from cuddled into Splinter's side finally catches Mikey's attention.

Master Splinter is the only one watching the film, "Is this what you get up to when handling people such as these? Are you that rough and proud with frustration at the ones committing crimes?"

"…Nnnoo," Raphael settles back into his seat, trying to resume his viewing of the movie as the picture of innocence – his brothers shyly do the same.

Raphael rapidly realises that this scene contains the Nightwatcher strutting his stuff before the sort of persistent yet hapless crook that offers you a visceral pleasure in overpowering.

He twitches and almost giggles out loud as the Nightwatcher hauls the crook up by the shirt with such commanding badass finesse.

"And we wonder why small children are growing up with the wrong messages from these 'cool' scenes," Don puts morality on it, then adds a tactical, "Why don't they make engaging stakes with causes and effects instead of detached coolness in action scenes anymore?"

And at that Raphael privately squirms with an easily ignorable confliction that still makes enjoying this unbearably uncomfortable now.

"_-Wait a minute… aw, how'd you know it was me?"_

"_Wasn't that hard man – you know you look like a big, metal turtle?"_

Movie-Raph sighs as he responsibly removes his helmet in full view of the crook, _"It's that obvious, huh?"_

"Buuuuut for some reason no one else has connected the dots?"

"Yeah that doesn't really make sense…" Raph admits.

"Or does it?" Leo sadly ponders at the distant and detached state of the Movie-family.

"But seriously – a once extremely close-knit family doesn't consider he's out all night doing what he loves disguised in a full-body suit that resembles an armoured turtle? Really? …Raph," Don turns to his brother with an epiphany, "This movie is up _your_ shell."

"…Oh my gosh it IS. I LOVE THIS FILM!"

Leo looks at him with big sad eyes.

"…Well… I mean… it's just… with you, you're a stick in the mud… I love you bro'," bearing an awkward smile he turns his body away from the beseeching gaze.

Donatello blinks slowly at the scene revealing the upside down crook chained to a streetlight and surrounded by onlookers, "How is humiliating a human being after intimidating and assaulting them with physical violence for any sort or number of crimes they've committed going to make the world better? Answer: it does not. You only make it worse by appealing to the general public's darker side. Basic psychology."

With all of these little annoyances building up Raphael gives Donnie a sharp glare, "Shut. Up."

He gives a pause before boldly stating, "No. Sometimes it's a _good_ thing when we're uneasily convicted – it reveals we're not a reliable compass for good and bad, that being comfortable or okay with something does not define truth for us; we have many feelings and reactions that need boundaries to uphold right and wrong outside of ourselves. The truth can hurt because it doesn't always agree with our own interests."

Leo purposefully applauds his kind brother for that hard-nosed but gentle toned evaluation in Raph's face.

"But… but… it's just one stupid crook!" Raph sensibly whines, kicking the back of the chair in front of him at all of these little misunderstandings, "Let me like self-righteously lording it over him with my fists!"

"_Neveeeeeer_," Don actually pulls off sounding extremely creepy in that soft voice of his.

Raphael immediately shuts up, eye twitching; after but a moment he sighs, "What'd I miss?"

"Well," Mikey prepares to surmise, "Movie-you is explaining to Movie-Casey that you're the Nightwatcher because you're not sitting around for Movie-Leo who is somehow the reason crime exists in the city of Shakespearean-non-quitters which you don't want Movie-Leo coming back to but only sort of since you almost understand leaving on a little vacation too but you won't anyway because the subway being your lullaby is from growing up in a house full of brothers."

Raphael stares at him for a moment.

"I think Movie-you was just dodging personal accountability for his own choices and behaviour by blaming the circumstances and everyone else. That's what the content of their discussion sounds like, at least," Donatello may be pushing it.

Raphael is grinding his teeth loudly.

As Movie-Casey goes to share his side of laments to a trusted friend it's soon revealed Movie-Raph has taken to snoozing… sitting upright on the edge of a roughly thirteen storey building.

Leo's fingers tighten around the arms of the seat, "Wear your baby harness! That's what you have it for!"

Raphael turns deep red with horrified mortification; a huge silent grin is mounting on Michelangelo's face as he gradually leans forward to see him whilst Donatello's grows ever increasingly blank at the thought.

Splinter is the only one to speak up, "I'm not sure which of you I need to have a talk with first."

END PART 2


	3. Chapter 3

"_Arise my brothers – arise dear sister!"_

Mike is busy marvelling at the animation and sounds, "Sweeeeeeet."

"_The Stars of Keekan align – all ye generals wake from your stone slumber!"_

"Why would a 3000 year old Native American speak with 'ye'?"

"…'Cause he's speakin' it in English?"

"OHMIGOSH LEO THERE'S YOU!" Mikey points excitedly, kicking his legs like a child.

Leo is too busy reassuring a deeply humiliated Raphael who can't seem to sit up.

"There is NO way he could stand there without being blown off like an idiot!" Don protests from where he leans against Splinter.

Mikey sighs, "Don, quit pretending like you know to judge a movie and give it a rest," Movie-Leo takes a dive and glides through the air over the river, "Go Leeeoooooh wait, I'm still weirded out with you calling me 'cute'. Find someone _else_ to give you big brother worship! Hmph!" and with that, Mikey crosses his arms and stubbornly sticks out his chin.

Leo looks up, eyes hard, "No one denies me that…"

Splinter warmly laughs at the current scene of his younger sons sleeping, "I will never understand how you boys can stand to sleep in such a mess."

The scene then reveals Movie-Leonardo has somehow entered the home completely air dried.

"Movie-Leo watches us sleeping," Donnie jokes.

"…What's wrong with that?" Leo asks, genuinely confused.

The two youngest brothers mutely shift closer to their father figure with deep disconcertion.

"…Nothing wrong with that…" Leo mumbles quietly to himself, still petting Raph comfortingly.

Raph just chuckles darkly to himself.

_"Enter. Kneel, my son."_

"'I can't Sensei'," Raph voices for Movie-Leo, "'I've got a bad knee bone that nearly got grinded to dust by a freaking anaconda; in fact, I'm my own fully grown turtle from these two years survivin' alone and I expect YOU to call ME-"

_"I return from my training, Master. I was so caught up in my own world, I forgot about everyone else. I'm sorry I failed…"_

Leonardo chews his lip, "If I went into the wild without any prior skills or know-how to survive there how _can_ am I so spotless? There's no visible scaring or even a tiny frayed part of the mask or _anything_."

"_That_ is what crosses your mind?" Raph waves a hand at the big screen before them, "Are you even _looking_ at the internal display animated on your Movie-self?! It's making _me_ squirm!"

"_On the contrary, my son. Now you are much __**stronger**__."_

"…Somehow that feels like the incorrect thing to say," Splinter is regarding his movie incarnation with scepticism.

"_Your strength is needed here now."_

"Aaand there's Movie-Raph! Popping up _just_ when Movie-Leo is done coming close to pouring his heart out and the context can now be incorrectly translated to anyone who is eavesdropping from this point on. Geeeeniuuuusss!"

"Mike, it's an overused cliché."

From his spot shrunken into the seat, Raph shrugs at Don's tone and says in a smaller voice than usual, "Eh, it's cliché but it doesn't make these sort of misunderstandin's less real."

"…True."

"Heck, Movie-me is _looking_ in on 'em but I bet he's just seein' more reasons to feel bad despite the fact Movie-Leo ain't even _smilin'_ 'bout receiving that medallion," then he adds faintly, "Done it enough times myself…"

"_You owe me no apology. But perhaps you should talk to Raphael."_

"Because mending bonds is long and difficult, requiring a conscious effort from both sides to fully heal. This is why you prepare your long-awaited son…" Splinter quickly reels in on his counterpart, "Or are you just hoping for a quick-fix now that the one Raphael happened to gripe over for is returned? Surely _you've_ had talks with _your_ troubled son long before this, yes?"

Mikey rolls his eyes, "Sensei, you're giving your Movie-self _way_ too little credit."

He sighs, "It is… something in my gut, my son. As much as I respect his voice actor – may he rest in peace – I feel there is a reason I cannot fully approve of this version of me… I'm just trying to find out why that is."

"_Good. Because until you can act as one, you are forbidden to fight."_

"See Master? Common sense of precaution," Mikey cheerfully asserts, "He's still an acting father and sensei, he's just… old and tired."

"_I have missed you, Leonardo."_

"_I've missed you too, father."_

The moment Raphael notices his Movie-version glancing away pained he lunges forward, ignoring the subsiding protest of his gut, "Oh don't you DARE feel sorry for yourself when those two ain't hugged for _TWO_ _YEARS_ _YOU_ _SELF-ABSORBED GIT_! How can you be twisting this into fuelling your angst?! " he notices his startled family, "What? Just because I _know_ how doesn't mean I give him a _pass_ for it," and then he drops back down into his humiliated position.

"_Raphael! Your brother is home!"_

They attentively witness the awkward reunion.

"…That's satisfyingly realistic and brief," Don is satisfied with the edited outcome.

"Agree – doesn't stretch itself out or nothin'," Raph agrees from down below.

Leo warmly watches the other's reunion hugs and says, "How long has Movie-me gone without casual physical contact? That's so important for a healthy psyche… you don't stop for two years then start again just like that."

"…Come to think of it, how much eye-contact did Movie-you give Movie-April at the beginning? And what if he sat separate from her over the campfire, a dear friend who has no problem sitting at your shoulder, because he simply couldn't handle too much close contact?" Don strokes his chin, "Hmmm… fanfiction material…"

"No, you're just seeing something that's not there. Happens a lot. Sometimes in a bad way…"

"Yeah, but now I've got it in my head, and the implications are adding up-!"

"_Okay Leo I'll bite – what are we doin' up here?"_

"_I told Splinter I'd get this team in shape again."_

"They look perfectly in-shape to me."

Raph tries to figure out the time, "…Is this the same night… or the next?"

Mikey smiles cutely, "Bonding time!"

"Yeah," Donnie agrees.

"Is that really all I inspire in my sons when it comes to _anything_ in connection to family? A narrow-minded emphasis on ninjitsu? Such unimaginative focus is beginning to come off as rather… superficial." Splinter ruins the moment again.

"Sensei, it's all Leo knows how to do. The fact he's using it to spend time together and stuff shows his love," Mikey bats his eyes with light-hearted drama.

"_Right. And while you've been playing games little brother, this Nightwatcher character's come into the neighbourhood like some kind of vigilante showboat; but his days are done."_

"Well that's a random shift in concern…" Leo admits his confusion.

"I'm sure there's a reason for Movie-Leo's interest… if the movie takes the time to show it?" Donnie tries.

"And why am I just taking charge? Where's the simple catching up from when I had left? Where's _their_ interest? No one is going to respect my leadership if I just expect things to just happen like that at their expense."

"_Crime never took a break. __**You did**__."_

Leonardo takes a moment to regard Movie-Raph, "I _really_ like the expressive animation on you."

"That's because Mike and Donnie don't really exist, so I get that bit more time and energy."

"And more self-serving denial," Don adds, "Leo wasn't on a break and he knows it."

There's a sudden roar off-screen.

"Oh yes-!" Raphael abruptly straightens up like nothing had ever happened; muscles tighten in anticipation, "A monster fight scene-!"

"_Oohoh, someone's cranky!"_

"My _gosh_ – why are my puns are so by-the-book?"

"Why do we have puns at all?"

"_Okay Jungle-boy, grab a vine."_

"_Raph – wait! Splinter told us not to fight!"_

"_Heheh 'Jungle-boy'! Good one!"_

"…Why are we so blatantly rebelling against Splinter's order not to engage in battle?" Don astutely buts in as Movie-Don and Movie-Mikey go ahead with it, "Why ignore Movie-Leo when we welcomed him with open arms just before? Why follow Movie-Raph's lead when he's been really difficult towards us for so long? Why are we just merging into the plot's momentum _without_ individualistic character development here?! Why has my Movie-self not shown any more personality depth? So far he's utterly shallow!"

With clear perception, Mikey hangs his head, "I held out my hopes, and they drop off the edge… this movie isn't about us as a family… it's about Raph and Leo!"

"The _deleted_ scenes had us being far more interesting," Don's voice is flattening into cynicism.

Raphael is far too eager to realise their disapproval, "Look! The monster!"

Mikey screams. Don remains uninspired.

Leo face-palms.

"_Bad news is this thing is going to run out of bodies soon."_

"_Yeah, so? You think we should help these guys? I'd rather enjoy the show; what do you say, Fearless Leader?"_

A flicker of displeasure crosses Mikey's face, "Why am _I_ antagonising Leo? I've got no reason to! Stop making me act like stereotypically disguised background dressing!"

"_**I**__ say we stop talking!"_

Raphael starts cackling abnormally once more as the Movie-turtles all follow Movie-Raph into a battle they have no understanding of and is blatantly not their business. Yay!

"…Why are Mike and I _doing_ this? Do we not have individual brains?" Don is flustered, stirred enough to sit up from his father's warm side.

"_You!"_

"Hi Karai," Leo waves to the screen.

"_I think we're getting off on the wrong foot here!"_

"_Foot_," Mikey repeats, still sounding a little sour, "…I see what you did there…"

"_We're trying to help you!"_

Leonardo shifts in his seat at a sudden thought, "Wait. If I've been on my own in the wilderness for two years, with no communication during the last, how can I speak and interact normally?"

The question makes everyone quiet.

"Don't make us think during the action crap Leo," Raphael eventually answers.

As Movie-Karai leaps gracefully off the unfinished sky rise, Mikey graces the action with a, "Wheeeeeeeee."

"Bye Karai."

"_A little help oh Fearless One."_

"Did our Movie-selves notice that Movie-Leo was engaged in a sword fight with his bare hands?"

"…Nah."

Leo suddenly gasps, expression gripped in silent distress as Movie-Raph gets slammed through multiple metal thingies before hitting a support beam that, alone, stops him from mortally sailing over the edge.

Raphael rolls his eyes, "It's just a movie. I'm safe on my butt right here next to you."

He sits back, slightly twitching as his Movie-brothers get thrown and beaten about, "…Force of habit."

Despite being mostly wrapped up in the action, he takes the time to pat his arm, "You can get through this. Deep breaths."

Leonardo's deep breathes start hyperventilating as Movie-Don narrowly stops himself from falling down an unfinished elevator shaft.

Mikey graces the baseless objects tumbling down the unfinished elevator shaft with a, "Wheeeeeeee."

"Why is nothing happening?"

All turtles look to their suddenly-breathing-normally eldest fixed with decidedly bemused expressions as their Movie-selves battle a freaking monster and losing.

Leonardo points to the explosively action packed scene with a practised tactical eye, "Look – were having a fight with one of the monsters from the beginning which ties into the plot, but nothing really fundamental underlines it. It's a plot-device action scene with puns, but aside from what occurred _before_ it, that's… _it_. And the camera isn't giving enough geography to reveal the fight as best it could, just a bunch of close-ups."

His brothers sit back, eyeing the scuffle anew.

"_What_ did I say about making us _think_?!"

"_Oh my shoulder!"_

"_My SPLEEEEN!"_

"Wheeeeeeeeeeee!"

Movie-Raph decides to free-fall off the side in order to catch up to the downwards moving brawl.

"Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-!" Mikey hits his limit and collapses with a tight wheeze.

"…I'm so useless. You know, for someone who's been on a super special highly levelled training period around the globe, living in the _wild_ and who knows what else; and yet I accomplish nothing in a fight against an _animalistic_ beast," another digressing thought clicks in Leonardo's brain, "How have I adjusted to city life and manmade constructions again so quickly? And what about jetlag?"

"**Stop! Thinking!** You'll make me miss out on all of **my**-_eer_, **our** unquestioning awesomeness!" Raph frets.

"_Ah, this place needed a skylight."_

And his face goes blank at his Movie-self, "…There was... no reason to say that."

He then sits unenthusiastically as their suspiciously unharmed Movie-versions dramatically back-up and get cornered instead of making what use they could of their closed-in surroundings like they did at the start and then two flail on each other squealing – all for the above roof to drop on them.

"…I am disappointed."

Donatello pats his arm, "Hey, so far you've got a well-rounded movie-you. I'm sure they'll be moments where you won't be disappointed."

"…Thanks Don."

And then the stone generals make their commanding entrance…! Raph starts drooling again.

As the strongest one tosses the lunging beast to the ground, Mikey asks, "Why is the monster just lying there?"

"He's admiring the view of them from below," Leo remarks.

Their Movie-selves escape from the rubble and look down to where the behemoth had landed in the clutches of the stone generals.

"_How did something that big just disappear, it doesn't-"_

"What do you mean 'disappear'?" Donatello questions his Movie-self, "You're looking straight at the area still lighted by that truck, and they couldn't have removed the beast and themselves so swiftly in that time…"

"Someone DO something!" Raphael demands.

"Let's not get too emotionally invested in this-" Leonardo suddenly leans forward and snaps at the precarious exposure of the dawdling Movie-Raph, "OH MY _GOSH_ RAPH – MOVE YOUR SHELL!"

Raphael jumps in his seat and almost moves himself.

"_Ooooh yeah! The turtle are __**back**__ dudes! I give us a ten for style, an eight for skill and a uh… two for… stealth…"_

"…We… are… AWESOME!" Mikey elates as the construction site breaks apart.

END PART 3


	4. Alternate Versions

_Author's Note_: hey guys - I'm very sorry for putting this halfway through the tale, I don't like doing this, but I'm a little conflicted between the first versions of Chapter 2 and 3 I wrote and the actual ones I posted... Please, if you'd like, let me know which version you prefer, or what parts, and why :).

I skipped to the parts that are different for your convenience :).

_…_

_Author's Note UPDATED!_

Thank you for your patience – I took a break, pondered, and realised my confliction was from a poor utilisation of what I had earlier written. For example, Michelangelo's summation of Movie-Raphael's conversation with Movie-Casey in Chapter 2 felt like a poor substitute for the broader version I had earlier written here which takes it apart piece by piece and makes better sense from where Mikey was coming from.

But the official one I posted had Don's awesome conviction in Raph's face. But this older one I had was balanced and attuned to what Movie-Raph was going through. But the official one I posted is more fluid and all-round better edited. But this older one makes a bit more sense as to why Raphael would speak and comment in Chapter 3 **_at all_** when he was in deep humiliation from Leonardo's unthinking outburst at the end of Chapter 2 (then again...) etc...

I think I simply rushed posting it when I should have held off for a few more days to smoothen everything I wanted with editing and to be better at peace with what simply didn't make it.

I'll take this lesson and try to learn from it – for I am a bit of a people pleaser and was just trying to get things in 'on time'… when there is no schedule for this thing and it's done in my spare time when I could've been playing with my little sisters!

So… what of this Alternate Versions chapter?

…Ah what the heck! Have these extras! Enjoy! XD

...

...

_...Chapter 2 Version..._

"_But… But didn't you tell him how weird things have gotten with the turtles?"_

"He knows it's a trap… they're acting off 'cause they're zombie vampires," Mikey insists, whispering mostly to himself, "Suck him dryyyyyyyy…"

The movie gives a grand low sweep of a large golden building.

Leo wrings his hands in emphasis, "This stylistic animatiiooooon-!"

"…Is that an external elevator?" Don shudders, "I've never trusted those. They seem too exposed to the elements… and public viewing. What if there's a technical issue and the whole thing just falls off and smashes into the pavement-"

"Stop _talking_ Donnie," Raph snaps, "You give us nightmare fuel and now paranoia and we're not even halfway through the film!"

Donnie bashfully sinks into his chair and says with a tiny voice, "…I'm sorry…"

"…Gah, no one can stay mad at you."

"Hey guys?" Mikey asks, "Since when did April have this kind of job?"

"Hm… April would be offended at how her design is shaped," Don agrees, "And not only due to the obvious materialism of beauty, but… just look at the way this Movie-April _moves_. It's… they've gone too far with the design… it's CREEPY!"

"SHADDAP DONNIE! …You're scaring me."

Whilst carting the large crate, Movie-Casey accidentally pulls it too close to a vase and knocks it over. Once it smashes, the entire building blares red and goes into lock-down.

"…Imagine if someone was standing underneath the doors at that one random point. Such a tragic squish."

"_DON_-!" Raph screams.

Donatello jumps, "I'm sorry-!"

"That is totally the 3000 year old immortal dude!" Mikey interrupts as the movie introduces 'Mr Winters'.

"…Is it just me, or does this 3000 year old Native American appear… rather Western?" Don latches on to something else for nit-picking, "The accent isn't surprising, as someone that old can easily master a language fluently in that time. But…"

"Are you sure those facial features are Western?" Leo tilts his head sideways at 'Mr Winter's' bold visage.

"…Well good," Mikey relaxes, "A bad dude that gets his own unique look without going overboard or looking 'perfect'. Eeeeexcept for that massive chest which leads to a tiny waist. At least he doesn't have a tiny head on top of a _massive_ chest like Hunny-bunny."

Raph blinks several times and tries to speak, "_**Hun**_ny-bunny-?"

"That's _it_; we've crossed the line from healthy criticism about physical beauty and appealing strength to _bullying_ appearances. Let's stop criticising people by how they look, please," Leo takes in Yaotl/Winters' demeanour, "…Now _he_ sounds weathered and nice. I bet he's gonna be an anti-villain."

"You shouldn't give the benefit of the doubt to the baddies, Leo," Raph smirks, "Have you so soon forgotten how your first meeting with Shred-head went down?"

"Stop mentioning that. Seriously."

What was meant as a joke sizzles into a bad taste in his throat. Raphael opens his mouth to apologise but, unsure of how, ends up merely watching the film.

They all quieten for a moment…

"…Karai's in the room," Splinter says a full three seconds before she indeed does make an appearance.

They all give their father an impressed look, "…How-?"

"And there is Foot too."

Sure enough, before they too appear, he's got it right.

"…That's a _movie_, Sensei. You _shouldn't_ be able to do that!" Donatello almost freaks out.

Splinter just smiles to himself; if only they knew he developed this sixth sense from watching his soap operas!

"I knew it!" Mikey exclaims as Mr Winters converses with the Foot, "He _is_ Yaotl!"

"Interesting," Don calms down and observes, "The movie has chosen to dispense with the mystery… wise call, I feel, for this story."

Raphael mockingly gapes at his brother, "Did you just say something _positive_ about a film? Shock gasp horror!"

"Funny."

"Karai looks gorgeous like that!" Mikey dares and then slyly addresses his big brother, "Hope I'm not making you uncomfortable, Leeooooo."

"…We're not even the same species-"

"You two have quite the relationship. Quite a _history_."

"I befriended and respected her. In the end we just couldn't trust each other. How do you confuse that with love-"

"Quiet!" Raph growls, "A pigeon just got eaten off-screen! How can you ignore that so heartlessly?!"

A few seconds pass before Michelangelo mouths his response back in silence. Catching the movement with his practised eyes, Leonardo leans forward in his seat and mouths back a silent retort.

They continue wordlessly mouthing and gesturing until Raph puts a hand to Leo's forehead in checking his sanity temperature, all while Donnie's unblinkingly observant gaze from cuddled into Splinter's side finally catches Mikey's attention.

Master Splinter is the only one watching the film, "Is this what you get up to when handling people such as these? Are you that rough and proud with frustration at the ones committing crimes?"

"…Nnnoo," Raphael settles back into his seat, trying to resume his viewing of the movie as the picture of innocence – his brothers shyly do the same.

Raphael rapidly realises that this scene contains the Nightwatcher strutting his stuff before the sort of persistent yet hapless crook that offers you a visceral pleasure in overpowering.

He twitches and almost giggles out loud as the Nightwatcher hauls the crook up by the shirt with such commanding badass finesse.

"And we wonder why small children are growing up with the wrong messages from these 'cool' scenes," Don puts morality on it, then adds a tactical, "Why don't they make engaging stakes with causes and effects instead of detached coolness in action scenes anymore?"

And at that Raphael privately squirms with an easily ignorable confliction that still makes enjoying this unbearably uncomfortable now.

"_-Wait a minute… aw, how'd you know it was me?"_

"_Wasn't that hard man – you know you look like a big, metal turtle?"_

Movie-Raph sighs as he responsibly removes his helmet in full view of the crook, _"It's that obvious, huh?"_

"Buuuuut for some reason no one else has connected the dots?"

"Yeah that doesn't really make sense…" Raph admits.

"Or does it?" Leo sadly ponders at the distant and detached state of the Movie-family.

"But seriously – a once extremely close-knit family doesn't consider he's out all night doing what he loves disguised in a full-body suit that resembles an armoured turtle? Really? …Raph," Don turns to his brother with an epiphany, "This movie is up _your_ shell."

"…Oh my gosh it IS. I LOVE THIS FILM!"

Leo looks at him with big sad eyes.

"…Well… I mean… it's just… with you, you're a stick in the mud… I love you bro'," bearing an awkward smile he turns his body away from the beseeching gaze.

At the corner of his eye he spots Michelangelo locking watery baby blue eyes at him; suddenly feeling cornered, he tactlessly wriggles in his seat and tries to ignore them both.

"_What was I supposed to do? Sit around, wait for Leo to come back and save the day?"_

"Good question," Splinter strokes his thinning beard, "My sons are all warriors, and Raphael needs a passionate outlet. What was there for him before he turned to this vigilante delusion? …Wait, why was there nothing to do simply because Leonardo left?"

"Why is it always all on Leo? You have two other brothers that exist too – and a Sensei!" Don makes clear.

"And what _has_ my counterpart been doing for the guidance of this family during Movie-Leonardo's absence?" Splinter muses suspiciously., "Not to pin the blame on an aging single parent, especially since they are no longer children, but…"

"SOMEONE MAKE THEM STOP LOOKING AT ME!" shouts a randomly desperate voice.

"_I mean we haven't heard word one from him, since Splinter sent him away on his little vacation."_

"…I thought there were letters…" Mikey mumbles, eyes slowly returning to the big screen.

"Little 'vacation'?" now Leo returns to the film, "I could be DEAD from plant poisoning or eaten ALIVE by a jaguar. My head could be shrunken in a tribal house somewhere! I might have gone INSANE!? _**Yeheeheehahaahaaahaahaah**_-! _Ahem_… I'm good."

"…I think only the Jivaroan tribes in the north-western Amazon rainforest perform headshrinking. And that's in South America, not Central."

"_Come on, you think these lowlifes take vacations at the first sign of pressure? No."_

Don nibbles on one of Mike's lollies, "Beating up lowlifes won't solve the pre-existing issues that lower their standards of life."

"But they certainly deserve it when they get it, like people who _won't_ _shut up_," Raph adds, squinting at his Movie-version, "…What's he s'posed to be talkin' 'bout? Movie-Leo leaving on a bogus training exercise at Sensei's command has _zilch_ to do with the existence of crime in our home city."

"I'm sure it's from a confusion of bitter jealously, betrayal, feeling unworthy-"

Raphael punches Leo in the face before the list could get too personal. In response to this affront, Leonardo… opens up a bag of chocolates. And doesn't share!

"_The criminal element of this city may be guilty of a lot of things, but being quitters ain't one of them."_

"To be or not to be!" Mikey dramatically proclaims.

"_I_ know what he's talking about; dodging the bullet of personal accountability. Note the content of this discussion – blame others and circumstances to excuse his own choices and behaviour," Don calmly discerns.

"I thought we're just watching a _movie_ here," Raph grunts a touch defensively, "Can't we just watch the movie?"

"_I don't even care about Leo anymore!"_

And at that Raphael ignores what he said a second ago, "You know I wouldn't mean that right bro'?!"

Leo turns to him with his face stuffed with chocolate, "_Muff_?"

"_Kind of hope he never comes back."_

"You-! You NOOB! Stop makin' me look bad!" Raph panics.

Leo pats his arm, "_Mifuh phay Phwaph_."

"_Come on, aren't you being a little hard on the guy?"_

"_I don't know, it's possible."_

"STOP LOOKING AT ME WITH THOSE EYES!" Raphael abruptly turns the blue mask around, easing his sensation of guilt, "…Aaah. Now all is well."

With the knot over his face and the material tails hanging over his mouth, Leo just shoves some more chocolate in while listening to the film.

"_I guess if I could live anywhere other than the city, I'd go too; but I could never leave this place."_

"But… then… what is he saying?!"

"Mikey shush. Let Movie-Raph ventilate to a trusted friend," Leo is still blinded, "It's important to listen without a critical attitude."

"_I can't even sleep without the sound of the subway running over my head. Guess it comes from growing up with a house full of brothers…"_

"…His subconscious habit of the familiar subway comes from… us? What?"

"Donnie shush. Not everyone is articulate with their personal junk."

"But this is a _movie_. You need clarification, even about that trait! Or it just falls flat!"

"Or this is one of those personality things that some just can't relate to as well as others, y'know? There's more than one life… then again, in entertainment there's even a wrong way to do that-"

"_I'm not trying to tell you what to do. I'm just saying that, if it was my brother, I'd find a way to work it out."_

"Casey shu- oh wait."

Mike and Don simultaneously berate, "Leo SHUSH!"

"_But that's just me. I've got my own issues, you know? Like back at home with April. It's just this whole thing about settling down thing that… makes me miss the old times. I don't know if I can be the grown-up she needs me to be…"_

"That concern… is actually rather self-aware. Where did this Casey come from?"

"…_Good talk Raph."_

"…He fell asleep without a subway rumbling over his head."

"And siting on the precarious edge of a roughly thirteen storey apartment building."

Leonardo jerks upright at the unseen info, "WHAT! _Without_ his baby harness!? RAPH – _what_ have I said about that!?"

Raphael turns deep red with horrified mortification; a huge silent grin is mounting on Michelangelo's face as he gradually leans forward to see them whilst Donatello's grows ever increasingly blank at the thought.

Splinter is the only one to speak up, "We need to talk after this, Leonardo."

END PART 2

...

...

_...Chapter 3 Version..._

_"Arise my brothers – arise dear sister!"_

Mike is busy marvelling at the animation and sounds, "Sweeeeeeet."

_"The Stars of Keekan align – all ye generals wake from your stone slumber!"_

"Why would a 3000 year old Native American speak with 'ye'?"

"…'Cause he's speakin' it in English?"

"OHMIGOSH LEO THERE'S YOU!" Mikey points excitedly, kicking his legs like a child.

"What?" Leo corrects his mask to see through.

"There is NO way he could stand there without being blown off like an idiot!" Don protests.

"I'm sure the movie-makers know that; in fact, there's a lot about movie making that the movie-makers know about which we, who criticise them, _do not_. Give them a break!" Raph sighs.

Watching Movie-Leo glide through the air over the river Mikey shouts, "Go Leeeoooooh wait, I'm still weirded out with you calling me 'cute'. Find someone _else_ to give you big brother worship! Hmph!" and with that, Mikey crosses his arms and stubbornly sticks out his chin.

"Okay then," he playfully taps Raph on the arm, "You."

"Dammit bro' I'm your equal, I will not be giving-…" all it takes is one look at Leo's subtle endearment and he's immediately pressed with obligation, "…It's still a no! …How do you _do_ that…?"

It's Don that speaks, "You should never look him in the eye when he's goofy, Raph; you just can't be prepared for it."

Splinter smiles warmly at the current scene of his younger sons sleeping and laughs, "I will never understand how you boys can stand to sleep in such a mess."

The scene reveals Movie-Leonardo, having somehow entered the home completely air dried.

"Movie-Leo is watching us sleeping…" Donnie jokes.

"…What's wrong with that?" Leo asks, genuinely confused and hurt.

The two youngest brothers blatantly stare at him before leaning to their father between them.

"…Nothing wrong with that…" Leo mumbles quietly to himself.

Raph just chuckles darkly to himself.

_"Enter. Kneel, my son."_

"'I can't Sensei'," Raph voices for Movie-Leo, "'I've got a bad knee bone that nearly got grinded to dust by a freaking anaconda; in fact, I'm my own fully grown turtle from these two years survivin' alone and I expect YOU to call ME-"

_"I return from my training, Master. I was so caught up in my own world, I forgot about everyone else. I'm sorry I failed…"_

Leonardo chews his lip, "If I went into the wild without any prior skills or know-how to survive there how _can_ am I so spotless? There's no visible scaring or even a tiny frayed part of the mask or _anything_."

"_That_ is what crosses your mind?" Raph waves a hand at the big screen before them, "Are you even _looking_ at the internal display animated on your Movie-self?! It's making _me_ squirm!"

_"On the contrary, my son. Now you are much **stronger**."_

"…Somehow that feels like the incorrect thing to say," Splinter is regarding his movie incarnation with scepticism.

_"You're strength is needed here now."_

"Aaand there's Movie-Raph! Popping up _just_ when Movie-Leo is done coming close to pouring his heart out and the context can now be incorrectly translated to anyone who is eavesdropping from this point on. Geeeeniuuuusss!"

"Mike, it's an overused cliché."

Raph shrugs at Don's tone, "Eh, it's cliché but it doesn't make these sort of misunderstandin's less real."

"…True."

"Heck, Movie-me is _looking_ in on 'em but I bet he's just seein' more reasons to feel bad despite the fact Movie-Leo ain't even _smilin'_ 'bout receiving that medallion," then he adds faintly, "Done it enough times myself…"

_"You owe me no apology. But perhaps you should talk to Raphael."_

"Because mending bonds is long and difficult, requiring a conscious effort from both sides to fully heal. This is why you prepare your long-awaited son…" Splinter quickly reels in on his counterpart, "Or are you just hoping for a quick-fix now that the one Raphael happened to gripe over for is returned? Surely _you've_ had talks with _your_ troubled son long before this, yes?"

Mikey rolls his eyes, "Sensei, you're giving your Movie-self _way_ too little credit."

He sighs, "It is… something in my gut, my son. As much as I respect his voice actor – may he rest in peace – I feel there is a reason I cannot fully approve of this version of me… I'm just trying to find out what that is."

_"Your absence has been particularly difficult for him. Though… he'll never admit it."_

"Aaawwwwww!" everyone coddles Raphael from all sides, "You just miss your big brother!"

Raphael freezes up, acting on an old instinct that if he doesn't move they'll get bored and go away.

_"I'm c-certain things will be back to normal in no time, Master."_

"Ah the shy awkward start of wanting to patch things up in family…"

_"Good. Because until you can act as one, you are forbidden to fight."_

"See Master? Common sense of precaution," Mikey cheerfully asserts, "He's still an acting father and sensei, he's just… old and tired."

_"I have missed you, Leonardo."_

_"I've missed you too, father."_

The moment Raphael notices his Movie-version glancing away pained he lunges forward, ignoring the subsiding protest of his gut, "Oh don't you DARE feel sorry for yourself when those two ain't hugged for _TWO_ _YEARS_ _YOU_ _SELF-ABSORBED GIT_! How can you be twisting this into fuelling your angst?! " he leans back and eyes his startled family, "What? Just because I _know_ how doesn't mean I give him a _pass_ for it."

_"Raphael! Your brother is home!"_

_..._

_..._


	5. Chapter 4

"I'm just sayin', your Movie-self should've let Movie-me be when the cops were comin'. Just 'cause he's an angry jerk doesn't mean he don't know what he's doin'."

Leonardo doesn't reply immediately, "…You're right; and he's probably the only one still well experienced with that. Which would mean he came regardless because he knew he had to… oh my gosh that's actually mature!" he leans forward in his seat enthusiastically, "Go Movie-Raph! Show your maturity! We believe in you!"

"Go Movie-me!" Don yells, "Show some character depth! Really, this film doesn't have to rigidly keep to real life logic, and it's got brilliant character and drama logic for Raph and Leo, but this is still a family of _five_!"

"Go Movie-ME!" Mikey flails his arms, "BRING COWABUNGA-CARL TO LIIIIIIIIIFE!"

"Go… Movie-Leo? Show us what you learned in the jungle or something… ah to heck with it – SHOW US ANOTHER MONSTEEERRRR!" Raphael knows his priorities.

"_What seems to be the problem?"_

"_The problem, is that we were merely hired to patrol the city, and report anything strange to you. You never said anything about __**monsters**__."_

"How _would_ they know who or what to look out for if Winters' never _specifies_? It just… boggles the mind how often that sort of thinking transpires in stories," Leo throws up his hands and shakes his head.

"You defending your giiirlfrieeend?" Mikey teases.

"She's dating _Dr_ _Chaplin_."

"…Jealooouuuuus?"

"_You do understand honour, don't you?"_

"Oooooh, Movie-Karai's gonna whip his butt," Raph predicts.

"_My, my, my. And what is your name?"_

The furry behemoth roars in Winters/Yaotl's face.

"What do you think it said?" Mikey asks, "Raph, you speak growling. What'd it say?"

Raph groans.

"_Then show these fools how a true warrior acts."_

"The Foot have done nothing foolish to warrant that. You hired them and left them unprepared with incomplete information…" Leonardo trails off at the looks he's receiving from his family, "…What?"

"You're defending the _**Foot**_?"

He has to think back on his own wording to determine a proper yes or no, "…No. Just pointing it out. Ninja honour and that…?"

"…You're weird," Raph concludes.

"_It's going to be quite a party,"_ Winters/Yaotl snaps his fingers and the pretty cage drops upon the beast.

"…I gotta rig something to react when I snap my fingers too," Donnie mumbles.

"Party? Did he just say party? Cowabunga-Carl's got you covered!" Mikey thumbs-up the movie.

"NOOO!" Raph discourages him.

"_Dudes, did anyone get the license plate of that thing that hit us last night? Ay my head…"_

"_Okay, that was just weird. I mean, first the Foot, then that hideous monster…"_

"_Yeah, it looked like your mom, dude!"_

"_Yeah, that would make her your mom too, doofus."_

"_Yeah, whatever…"_

"Yeah…" Mikey says.

Leo watches the unfolding scene with deeply relatable feeling.

"_Keep laughing Mikey. Last night was an embarrassment!"_

"_I'll tell you what's embarrassing. You can't eve follow a single order."_

"_Ohoho how cute. You're back for five minutes and you're already schooling us on your master plan?"_

"_Oh, okay, so this is my fault now, huh Raph? I'm the ONLY ONE THAT HAS TO BE RESPONSIBLE?!"_

"_Hey, you're the trained master, not me."_

"Am I ever like that?" Raph sighs, shaking his head at what he sees, "_Punch_ me if I'm ever-"

Leo smashes a fist into his jaw – Don smacks an elbow to his collar bone – Mikey tosses a nunchaku which belts him across the cheek. Raph sits stunned.

Splinter grimaces at such behaviour, "You three are _all_ in trouble. We will discuss your punishments after the film."

They fall into sombre silence… yet despite himself Splinter privately laughs at the way these Movie-sons attempt to conceal the trouble as his Movie-counterpart walks on screen, humming a Japanese lullaby.

And, despite themselves, a certain pair starts snickering.

"You two are like little girls!" Mikey complains, "Stop giggling!"

"We do not giggle!" Raph snaps through the pain in his jaw.

"It's the way Movie-us are _eating_," Leo points, "Maybe it's just because that's 'us', but it's so pettily dramatic it's funny!"

"_Hothead."_

"_Splinter Junior."_

"_Cody is going to break up with Donna, I just know it…!"_

Splinter is griped at this dramatic prediction, "Say it isn't so-!"

However the 'Gilmore Girls' programme is left on a maddening cliff-hanger as the soap is interrupted by a telling news bulletin… _"BOOOYS!"_

"_Leonardo, I am most disappointed in you," _Leonardo sinks into his seat with a familiar and heavy grave feeling, _"You are the eldest of your brothers; __**I was counting on you to bring order to the chaos of this family**__."_

Splinter chokes.

Raphael gapes.

Don laughs incredulously.

Mikey lowers his hand of food from his mouth.

Though deeply touched at the familiarity unfolding in this scene, Leo sees no issue; so it's safe to say he basically jumps at the unexpected outbursts to his left.

"WHAT THE SHELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!" Raph explodes with defensive indignation.

"My sentiments to a T!" Splinter's fur bristles, grinding his sharp flat teeth.

"How _could_ you have such an expectation?! On your most obedient _son_?!" Donatello can't ease the sick feeling in his chest.

"The term 'taken for granted' has just been reinvented for me," Mikey is the only one not raising his voice, "That… right there… is disgusting! Manipulative! It hurts the sacrifices made for families by real people and real Leo's everywhere!"

"Precisely!" Splinter taps his cane to the floor with a bit more force than necessary, "This film has confused the profound differences between the unrealistic ideal of magically making things right for the family and _being there _for the family! Both require self-sacrifices, but only the latter is of a healthy and truly helpful variant!"

Leo decides it would be best not to voice his uncertainty in this matter.

So instead he smiles approvingly at Movie-Raphael's given lease on walking out of the gathering, "It's good that he's giving his Movie-son space though."

"Or…" Splinter might be getting a little too personally affronted at the movie, "Is completely forgetting that this moment was supposed to be a _team_ matter! I think there is also a confusion of the responsibilities of leadership and accountability of team members and the state of circumstances here!"

"This film is against you Leo!" Raphael is in horror, "Stop watching it! You'll only hurt yourself with all these half-truths!"

"…I'll be fine…?"

"No! You won't! You're never fine with this stuff!" Raphael wraps a thick arm around his shoulders, locking his muscles neatly between the rim of Leo's shell and the back of his neck, "If it gets too much, I'll knock you out in a sleeper hold…"

"…Thanks…" his skin prickles with unease at the… offer, "…You can let go now."

"No."

"…Let me go."

"_No_."

He's trying his damn hardest not to freak out lest he encourage the early use of the… offer, "…_Please_?"

"Nooooooo."

The Stone Generals begin to effortlessly round up the numbered beasts with little to no help from the sidelined Foot Clan…!

"That's a lot of wicked lookin' monsters," Raph says, impressed at the level of imaginative thought and design put into these scarcely appearing beasts, "We need a totally badass theme song for this montage."

Leonardo sits very quietly, "…Pink elephants on parade."

Raphael joins in, "Here they come-"

The two sing in unison, "-Hippity hoppity! They're here, and there – pink elephants everywhere!"

Michelangelo covers his face, laughing softly as Donatello and Splinter exchange bemused looks.

The movie continues the Stone General's show of force upon the monsters, "Look out! Look out – they're walking around the bed, on their head, clippity cloppity! Arrayed, in braid, pink elephants on paraaade!"

Mikey pats his father's arm, "Don't try to figure it out – it's a Leo-Raph thing."

"Isn't that _Dumbo_…?" Donnie tries to recall.

Raphael gets up, yanking on Leo's hand, "We should skate dance on the chairs!"

Leonardo resists the tug as he laughs, "No-_ho_-_ho_!"

Raphael slumps back down sniggering; then snaps his head towards the others, glaring menacingly. And with that, Leo sighs –his improvised plan to dislodge Raphael from him has borne fruit.

The scene eases into the apartment owned by Movie-Casey and Movie-April, who are reading the newspaper and practising _katas_ respectively – all while the news plays in the background.

"Go April!" Mikey hollers.

"…That newscaster has the exact same expression every time he reports something," Don rubs an eye.

"_Well at least some people care about justice these days."_

"...I feel like saying something to that, but I'm too tired," Donatello rests himself back onto Splinter's side.

"_Meet me on the roof, okay?"_

"_What is it?"_

"…_The 'roof'. Y'know what the roof is, don't'cha?"_

Raphael grins, holding a hand to the subtle upset of his stomach, "Buuurrrn."

"_Casey, come look at this."_

"Oh, no you _did not_," Raph growls at Movie-Casey's barefaced disregard of at least letting her know of his leaving, "She's yer' wife or fiancé or girlfriend or whatever! Respect her more _dammit_!"

"_Be safe…"_

"You man-child. You don't deserve her," he crosses his arms.

"_What's this all about, Raph?"_

Shadows outline Raphael's scowl, "What's _goin' on_ is you ain't givin' your own woman due respect! Man up! Even _my_ Casey knows better!"

"_SCREEEEEAAAAAAACH!"_

Mikey screams.

Movie-Raph and Movie-Casey chase the airborne abomination across the rooftops. Raphael blinks and his mood switches to the music, suddenly engaged in the monster moment.

Out of curiosity Leonardo waves a hand in front of Raphael's enrapt face, but ends up with no reaction. He shrugs and munches on some of his chocolates.

"_I think we lost it."_

"_Eh it's gotta be around here somewhere…"_

"_I don't think so…"_

"_SCREEEEEAAAAAAACH!"_

Mikey screams.

Apart from that, everyone watches with interest at how this culmination of monster, Foot and Stone Generals all coming together will turn out before their Movie-brethren.

"_Wait a second. Those statues look – whoa!"_

"Oh no," Leo couldn't stop the words from coming out.

"Poor Casey. Sucks always ending up accidentally doing the mistake," Mikey mumbles empathetically.

"_Witnesses!"_

As the Foot shoot darts at those who they surely recognise as an old archenemy, Movie-Raph moves to protect his friend with his own body – from his sacrifice a dart hits Movie-Raph in the shoulder; Leo audibly gasps.

"Dammit Leo I'm _safe and sound RIGHT NEXT TO YOU_!" then he rallies on the other three to this left, "And why don't I ever get called out on the _**good**_ things I do?! Be it by accident or on purpose ONLY THE BAD GETS SPOKEN ABOUT EVERY SINGLE DAMN TIME! And you wonder _**why**_ bad stuff is _**always**_ _**on my mind!?**_" he suddenly realises he's just screamed something important into their caring faces, "I mean… pretend I said that in a nice, controlled, well-thought-out voice…"

Meanwhile Leo is wringing his hands in exasperation towards Movie-Casey who just stands there looking and commenting at the oncoming danger, "_Grab_ Raph and _go_ you fool!"

Movie-Raph, through his drugged haze, realises the danger and chucks a smoke pellet to cover their escape…

"_*cough* Oh that's just rude!"_

Leo bangs his head into his fists at Movie-Casey's inept (but admittedly human) ability to react to mind-boggling danger in the moment; because how dare he not have been trained from toddlerhood to be as reactive as a ninja!

Movie-Raph hauls Movie-Casey into hiding before leading him to another spot – all whilst futilely fighting the strengthening effects of the drug.

Raph sighs at Movie-Casey being… 'Casey', "But we love him regardless…"

"_Aw come on! That's the second mask this week!"_

"Why are you speaking while hiding?!" now he's just plain infuriated – that's his drugged Movie-brother being put at risk here thanks to an inane need to comment!

"Leo," Raphael grabs his cheekbones with one rough hand and turns his head to face each other eye-to-eye, speaking firmly and composed, "I'm _fine_. I am _right here_."

He narrows his eyes and mimics his tone, "I _know that_."

Leo slaps his hand away. Raph quickly slaps that hand back. They get into a slappy fight.

"_You on the roof! Put your hands behind… your… What is it?"_

Mikey smirks, "It's the stone-man flashing his thousand year old stone undies at them!"

Stone-man turns to retreat and Movie-Raph faints; he and Donatello burst out laughing at the timing – but the stubborn noises to their right completely ruins the moment.

"Guys," straightening up in his seat, Don addresses his older brothers, "Can we just… please cut that out?"

The slap-happy fight had at some point changed to Raphael getting the upper hand and is currently choking and shaking his brother. At Don's request – and Splinter's eye on his back – he ceases. Facing the movie he nonetheless remains on edge for any sudden counter attacks by the infamously skilled Leo, but none are forthcoming.

Leo merely resettles in his seat, rubbing his neck and moving on with another bag of treats.

The scene changes to the other not-as-important turtles finishing up their dinner in what promised to have been a rather nice moment between them. And it was never shown. Because this film is about ego-boosting angst; anything else is _unworthy_.

"Why isn't my stomach rejecting the modern western food?" Leo puts in for the sake of it.

"Why is a movie about _family_ only focusing on _two_ of its members?" Don drowsily grouses, "Any bit they give Mikey and I is just because we happen to exist. This movie could at _least_ remember that I've been in charge or something during Leo's absence and had a difficult relationship with Raph for it instead of, well, dropping the consequences of the fact; and how Mikey feels always being sidelined and putting up with it and so interrupted he has to resort to obnoxious joking to be at least heard by someone."

"I'm not left ou-"

"Exactly," Leo interrupts, "This film has so much potential just sitting on the sidelines gathering dust. So much of what's _in_ the movie is glossed over for the sake of… awesomeness, I guess – I mean, no tale is told perfectly and I do like it so far, but… yeah. It could have been so much more."

"But everyone is just interested in the dynamic between you and Raph, and families being torn apart from the inside out so passive-aggressively is tragically relatable in many ways, so it works. That," Don rolls a stiffening shoulder, "And movie-writers get a lot of crap for the state of the final when it's more due to pressing time issues, director decisions, changes from script to film, etcetera… or maybe the script sucked and the director whatever or a bunch of whoever else's involved in this ended up making it better than what it might've been… ugh, I'm going to stop assuming stuff I don't know now."

"_Raph'sbeenhurt-you'vegottocomeoverhererightaway-"_

"_Woah-woah-woah, slow down April; what happened to Raph?"_

"_I-I don't know he's unconscious."_

"_I'll be right there…"_

Leo eyes the one to his immediate left, "Be sure to burn that moment into your brain Raph. That is what you _aren't_ around for when you _do_ this sort of thing to us."

"Heh, and Mikey's just oblivious," Raphael does a great effort dodging the subject as he watches it.

"_Leo! You came back!?"_

"_Leo :D!"_

"_Sorry the reunion isn't under better circumstances…"_

"Hang on. If this is the fourth of the older three movies, wouldn't that mean this is the _same_ Raph that got thrown through April's roof by the Foot in the first movie?"

"…So…?"

"…Nothing, I just thought that'd be interesting history to bring up."

"_Well his vital signs seem to be okay… pupil dilation is normal…"_

"…That's all? Why'd they call you for help? You're useless Donnie."

"That hurts. I'm a technician, not a doctor! It's not fair when everyone automatically expects me to _do something_ just 'cause I'm super smart!"

As Movie-Don marvels at the embedded stone weapon, Raphael begins tapping his fingers impatiently.

But watching Movie-Don immediately wedge out the broken weapon sets Raphael's eye twitching, "…Movie-Don. I'm _unconscious_ on the floor with a _specially concocted serum for_ _knocking out monsters_ in my veins. And you're checking out a flippin' STONE?!"

"_Well is he gonna be alright?"_

"Thank you Movie-Leo for returning the attention back to the more pressing issue at hand!"

"_You still here? Go back to your jungle…"_

"Sometimes I hate my own toughness…" he says as admirably as he could.

"_And there's an engraving on it… Looks… South American. That's your department April."_

"Stop," Don raises his hands, "The map roughly marked southern _Mexico_ in the beginning of the movie. Then it turned to _Central_ America. And now we're discussing _**South**_ America?! THOSE ARE **THREE** **DIFFERENT PLACES **PEOPLE! TREAT THEM AS SUCH OR ELABORATE ON YAOTL'S HISTORY MOVING ACROSS THE LAND! Grrr…"

"_Would it help things if I told you that those statues you collected for that Winters guy were shooting these things at me and Raph?"_

"…Movie-Casey just kept the most VITAL PIECE OF INFORMATION THAT I WOULD HAVE NEEDED TO BETTER UNDERSTAND RAPHAEL'S CONDITION _**TO HIMSELF**_!?-!"

Not one to scream out obscenities, Donatello fumes with his mouth clamped shut like a mad beast in his middle seat; this results in Splinter leaning towards a cowering Michelangelo to protectively cover him as Raphael pushes himself onto Leonardo in a frightened hug.

"_-a scary story the locals told kids around a campfire!"_

"_Whoa, what are you talking about?"_

No one comments on the probability of Movie-Leo knowing or not knowing of this legend during his own two years spent in Mexico/Central America/South America/I'm confused now.

Movie-April begins to narrate…

As she does the scene changes into the families' worst timed nightmare – a sweeping scene of _historical_ monuments representing Yaotl's immortality while Donnie was in The Mood. And sure enough, seeing them made Don rigidly clam up.

No one dared to so much as breathe loudly in fear of setting him off.

He starts with a calm enough voice, "…First of all… Well done. Well done on getting the timelines right. But _how_ could he have travelled the oceans to reach the Middle East or what would've constituted as Europe in the year 993 B.C. just to be _in time_ with these empires? And why _would_ he, when the knowledge of the portal and anything connected to it was all founded _in his_ _homeland_? And _why_ did he decide to rule all these regions and not any in Asia or the Pacific or even the Mayans and Aztecs? Why is it _only_ Rome, Persia, Greece, Babylon and Ancient Egypt!? I NEED REASONS!" and for reasons untold - but quite possibly exaggerated - he sucks in a deep breath and, "_**AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH**_!"

…

Mikey is the one to try and break the silence, "…So, he's had history in Europe? That would explain the 'ye'."

"The _**what**_ now?" Don is too irate to rationalise.

"Well he said 'ye' way back in-… never mind."

END PART 4


End file.
